05.04.2026: Type?

AlaLie are hyungs. Big Brothers. How did I arrive at this conclusion? Recently I have been enjoying contents from Korean vtuber group called "Sukoshism". Sukoshism has two members that are older in age compared to the rest of the group, so they are called with "Big Brother" honorific according to Korean (honestly, most of Asian) custom. Nino Sunday is one of the hyung, but he's loud as hell. He's the leader, it's natural that he assumes caretaker position. However, since I also read gsgw and liked Agent Choi, Nino sounds like how I imagine how Agent Choi's voice would be like all this time. So, it seems like I have a preference for cheerful Big Brother figure?

How this conclusion leads to AlaLie? Hard to explain but, imagine having them as siblings. Wouldn't they be the reliable ones, either advancing earlier due to the sense of providing his closest ones (Al) or kinda lost midway, yet still being someone to call for encouragement or support (Charlie)? Tag-team of Big Brothers, I really like the idea of they stand on equal footing instead of, say, older x younger dynamic.

Worth to mention, seems they have came in peace with their own masculinity. It's not like "Al is more masculine than Charlie" or vice versa, it simply manifests differently. No need to compete, they can exist side-by-side.

01.04.2024: Imaginary Friend?

I discussed with my boyfriend, about whether I should continue pursuing AlaLie or not. He said, from writing perspective, better to start anew in order to gain fresh writing perspective. I may always trash-talk them, but whenever someone suggests me to put them aside, I don't want to do that. Whether it is because of stubbornness or wanting to stay at comfort zone forever, I'm not sure.

I told boyfie, making new characters would prolong daydreaming issues, instead of solving it. I take "too much spending time on fantasy lala land" perspective in this conversation, not the usual CREATIVE GRINDSET HOW TO APPEAL TO EVERYONE AND SHOT TO 100K FOLLOWERS scheme which most people use to argue with me.

Furthermore, with pleading emoji, I confessed "they're my imaginary parent" to him. The most honest, raw, no-bullshit acknowledgement about them. I found an article about imaginary friend from 2015, I can truly relate to the experience.. down to panic attack moment.

They used to be my companion during ehm The Worldwide Lockdown Era, especially because around that time everyone in my household tend to be mentally unstable. It's a struggle between attachment and the "shoulds" in my head, whispering about how childish it is to keep holding onto them.. also, strange. Since I can't really post about AlaLie with my real name attached, a shame. I have paranoia of what people would think if they discover my hyperfixation.

However, there's sense of romanticizing life when I wear my OC's rose-tinted glass. My chest flutter as they utter sweet assurances, comfort albeit long-term fight that has been concluded. The question of "should I quit" remains unanswered, but the fact they're always suspended on the air makes them always available to pick up back.

01.04.2024: Moving From Index

Almost a month since I built this website. Now I'm looking at it, AlaLie sketches from the index page seems out of place, no? So I move it here, preserving the content. Well, I'm gonna yap about OCs anyway (not sure if I should put this page here or at /sub-blog). Dedicated section, yay.



By @feik-art on Discord

04.03.2026: I joined art event server called "March Cafe"! There people can purchase commission with server currency "coins".

By @raulrawwr on Discord

01.03.2026: Apparently Raul (fellow Providence server member) had been enticed by this doomed parent-like duo! Raul is actively simping other people's OC, I see.

# PVD Chat

March 15, 2026

chdys 15/03/2026

Talk to me, funny brainmade person 🚬 @Awawi

Awawi 15/03/2026

In your utmost desperation, you run to no other than me? How friendless are you, fellow brainmade person 🍭

chdys 15/03/2026

*kick
Quit acting like a corporate pawn and think about.. well. Life outside your job.

Awawi 15/03/2026

We go to work, eat, and sleep. Go beyond and be sigma graaaahhh
Nah I'm kidding. But do you aware that.. there's man in manipulation? Wah.

chdys 15/03/2026

Your mind is filled with internet rot, dude

Awawi 15/03/2026

When feeling blue, any attempt to spark a fire will be extinguished by the breeze🍃
Why are you summoning me, peasant.

chdys 15/03/2026

.... Why, I wonder.
Pain aid, I might say.

Awawi 15/03/2026

Yeah. same. in pain.

chdys 15/03/2026

Before you sugarcoat everything and turn it into motivational speech, how long will we continuously inhale copium?

Awawi 15/03/2026

What's wrong with sugarcoating though? With passive aggressiveness brewing underneath—you should be glad the emotion won't explode like overfilled pot. It might be a recipe for happy-go-lucky fellow, but I can't guarantee
I am merely a person who loves to knit my words in intricate ways

chdys 15/03/2026

I think it's better to perceive a struggle as it is, rather than lying to oneself. The former, the storm will pass, because we allow ourselves to feel the negative "alarms"

Awawi 15/03/2026

Rather than dwelling, it might be more accurate to say "locate the insecurities"? Like when 'ya name it, it will become obvious. Once you know what's the obstacle, you can solve it. Second, this is weird thought of mine, but sugarcoated sour candy isn't that bad of a taste. You wanna eat a block of sucrose without any hint of citrus? If it were me, I wouldn't~

chdys 15/03/2026

Yeah. Eating sour candy can make one 'totes awake Well I get my wisdom, I shall abandon you

Awawi 15/03/2026

Bloody hell mate

chdys 15/03/2026

Nope. I think I will be guarding tonight, picking up my man for back up

Awawi 15/03/2026

Sheesh you call me "my man"? I thought I am a speck of dust for you

chdys 15/03/2026

🖕

Message "PVD Chat"

# Al's Home Office

March 13, 2026

Charlie Dyslin 13/03/2026

Charlie had been staying over at Al's place for few days, because.. there's something significant they need to talk about. Aside of doing their "nightly" activities, of course. Anyways. He just slouched at Al's comfortable couch. The cold air of dusk kinda bothers him, but it makes the atmosphere intimate.

"So..." said Charlie. "Do you want to do it here? Truly? I don't question your devotion, but, the way it is, looks like elopement more," Slight joking tone added at the end of his words.

Alaric Noé Vaillant 13/03/2026

The smaller man, merely exist, his fierce gaze relaxed more than usual, but Al can't help to not imagining doing things to him. Buddy buddy mode, now. Al mirrored Lie's gesture, but of course height advantage can make the former towers Blondie easily.

"What if, it's truly elopement?" The corner of Al's mouth raised. He grazes Lie's lips with thumb. "Welp. I sound like yandere. As long we become official? No matter how trivial it is to the world. It's significant for us,"

Charlie Dyslin 13/03/2026

His lips touched like that, activated Lie's fight response. Betraying his initial response though, Lie's body was leaning towards Al.

He gripped the bigger man's wrist. "I thought you're gonna only having fun time forever," he said. He smirks in similar way Al does. "I don't mind. Who cares about certificates? There or not, we will always be the same,"

Lie moved his seat closer to Al. Instinctively, seeking heat from Al's fluffy body.

Alaric Noé Vaillant 13/03/2026

Oh my god, Lie's body is truly following its desire, eh?

"I do," Al wrapped Lie's shoulder with one of his arm. "Building legacy, it is. Maybe once we officiate things, I and you can be truly a family,"

Charlie Dyslin 13/03/2026

Lie's hand go somewhere else, slipping under Al's shirt. It's nothing much, Lie likes to caress his partner's warm skin.

"Is it not some revenge because you're feeling heartbroken, no?" The provocative smirk persist.

Alaric Noé Vaillant 13/03/2026

Al cackled. He gently pushed Lie's entire body down to the seat.

"Hmm," His eyes' bottom lid are curved up, hinting playfulness. "It's up to you to decide. However, you're being brave today hm? Initiating like that. How about, no~?"

He tickled Lie's waist.

Charlie Dyslin 13/03/2026

"Oy, oy, fuck you," Lie wiggled like a cat. He doesn't laugh, but his eyebrows almost knit together, frowning. His free legs kicking Al, despite missing the target.

Alaric Noé Vaillant 13/03/2026

Al wonders if he needs to push "Lie's button", but Blondie might be too happy about that as a result.

He does, anyway.

Message "Al's Home Office"